When Chairs Fly

What happens when one 11 year old boy, dealing with bipolar and ADHD and feeling very restless and hyperactive, teases (over and over) one 13 year old boy dealing with NLD/AS and unable to access an acceptable solution in that moment of stress?

Chairs begin to fly!

I looked out the window yesterday in time to see one of the chairs from our front porch sailing over the rail and out into the yard. Knowing what was probably happening I ran out to intervene. I had seen this coming earlier in the day, but had hoped going outside to play would use up some of the building energy in both boys. The boys were separated and after a few minutes to calm down I talked to 13. We had a discussion (again) about acceptable options for dealing with these types of instances, about realizing when he's getting upset and understanding what he's feeling. Then I had him find a quiet activity to do that would help him focus on something else and calm down. He chose searchword puzzles. This has been his activity of choice recently when he's feeling restless, bored or upset.

With 11, who was seeming very defensive and hostile at this point I simply had him find a quiet activity. He chose to watch TV. Later in the day, after he was a little calmer, we talked (again) about how other people feel when he says unkind and hurtful things, even though in his opinion he's only teasing.

Both boys were told they would need to stay inside until they showed me they were able to interact appropriately.

The rest of the day went smoothly and both boys were able to enjoy doing things together. They even combined their money later in the day to buy a treat to share.

LEARNING MORE ABOUT NLD

Today has been a nice quiet day so far. Six-seven inches of snow overnight has slowed business dramatically today.
I only have four kids here for daycare today and three of the four are school-age. They have been busy with my two oldest kids all day. The fourth child is seven months old and has slept quite a bit. I guess she had a busy weekend.
I haven't been back on the blog in the past week because I've reviewing the research on nonverbal learning disorder. My 12 yr. old son has nld and lately I've felt like we are at a standstill developmentally and that I needed a refresher course and some new ideas. Also my assistant here at the daycare has been asking some questions and I needed to find some information for her to help her understand the issues we are dealing with daily.
The hardest thing to deal with lately has been his temper which I really believe is caused by his frustration. He realizes that learning and simply dealing with life in general is much harder for him than for his younger sister (age 10).
After doing a lot of reading I feel better equipped to deal with everything. I also found some really neat ideas for projects that we can do together that I hope will be fulfilling and challenging for him without overwhelming him.
And now I am off to do some more research.